Genesis 19

1The(A) two angels came to Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gate of Sodom. When Lot saw them, he rose to meet them and bowed himself with his face to the earth 2and said, "My lords,(B) please turn aside to your servant’s house and spend the night(C) and wash your feet. Then you may rise up early and go on your way." They said,(D) "No; we will spend the night in the town square." 3But he pressed them strongly; so they turned aside to him and entered his house. And he made them a feast and baked unleavened bread, and they ate.
4But before they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house. 5(E) And they called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight?(F) Bring them out to us, that we(G) may know them." 6Lot went out to the men at the entrance, shut the door after him, 7and said, "I beg you, my brothers, do not act so wickedly. 8(H) Behold, I have two daughters who have not known any man. Let me bring them out to you, and do to them as you please. Only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the shelter of my roof."

I would like to take a balanced and fair look at the “sin” in this well known and well used story from the book of Genesis, the very first book of the Bible. The book where by word and word alone God created heaven and earth and all. God also declared all created as good. So, I’d like to look at the word and extrapolate it down to a very real and meaningful aspect of my life. The indictment in this story is the word, “know.” There is no doubt about what the men of Sodom mean by know. In this instance it has nothing to do with affection or caring. In this book of the Bible the word know means hurt, abuse, belittle, control, humiliate and be inhospitable.

Righteous Lot offers his virgin daughters to be hurt, abused, belittled, controlled, humiliated and violated an offer witnessed by the people of Sodom. The men of the city say no; it is the strangers that they want to violate. Here’s where the story takes on relevance and power in my world. It revolves around being a stranger and in some cases being treated as a stranger by those related or just that close. It is the realization that “loved ones,” as close as blood can view me as a stranger with perhaps contempt and bigotry and perhaps veil their bigotry in God’s word.

Those close or not will say that my being gay is a mortal sin. That for me there can be none of God's grace, love or redemption because of what I am, who I love and what I find attractive. They will say that I cannot get into Heaven because I will not live a lie, I will be true to myself and therefore be relegated to hell. That if I wanted to ask another man to marry me it would fly in the face of their marriage contract which they view as holy and divinely appointed and approved, which I believe it is. I ask, but what has that to do with me and what have I to do with them? I see it as nothing. My choice to marry, union, bond, live with or use whatever word best describes the union has little if nothing to do with them on a Biblical level or really any level other than perhaps bigotry or some sort of phobia.

My partner John died eight years ago. We'd spent many years together forging a life together, traveling, owning property, attending church, paying taxes, cooking, entertaining, paying bills, cutting grass, visiting with friends and on and on. I think that my point in laying all of this out is very clear...a marriage or union so to speak. John got sick and was in hospital; a close family member didn't come to visit. John passed away and a family member didn't come to the funeral. I melted down for a couple of years after John died and several close family members didn't call, write or check in much. At the time I didn't think much of it and oh yes these family members were friends of Johns. They'd broken bread with him and spent a fair amount of time in his company.

Since so much time has passed and I've had time to heal and reflect it has become clear to me that there is a fair level of inhospitable behavior in some of my family's actions. By devaluing my relationship with John they were acting as the folk of Sodom; there was a void of hospitality. That coupled with the judgment of a very pointed bumper sticker referring to marriage between one man and one woman causes me pain when I see these family members.

I don't understand the need for the bumper sticker or that particular marriage point of view. How are they hurt or even affected by two men or two women creating a union and calling it a marriage? If the people love one another, and love is good and God is responsible for all that is good and all in all, where is the threat, the harm or the danger to them? To deny one what is good is inhospitable and that is the sin of Sodom. This is a good place to point out that all sin is supposedly equal.

My mind then races to find the motivation? Could it be that these folks are mired in the judgment and anger of the Old Testament? How do they reconcile their feelings to the verse John 3:16? How do they reconcile the fact that they do not adhere to Levitican code of the Old Testament but they expect others to do so? How then do they approach the fact that Christ was sent fully God and fully human to create a new covenant and bond with God and the redemption of the world and human kind? Is that love and redemption not available for all who believe? Is it only available to some that live life exactly like they do, going to the same type of church, having the same friends, denying anyone outside of their view of the Christian bubble, salvation and grace by judgment and bigotry. How do you win people to the loving mission of a Christ centered church by painting a circle and painting others out with judgment, castigation and inhospitality?

My answer is simple, I don't know. To be sure, I cannot even talk about this with my family. I don't know how to broach it and I'm not sure if it is even worth it to do so...perhaps in my mind the void is too wide. With so much time, I avoid the deep and needed conversations of reconciliation with them My fear in opening a conversation is that words will turn bitter and rude. So I stay quiet and polite. I know what my mission is; it is to love and be friends with all who I encounter, that by demonstrating my openness and willingness to accept them for what they are and where they are they can come to know the joy that I feel.

You are the salt of the Earth and the light of the world

Matthew 5:13-16
Salt and Light
"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.
"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

I just love the beatitudes and the lessons in them. Today I went to a new church for me and the lesson was taught on these verses and it was so inspiring and relevant and timely. The pastor essentially said that followers of Christ live in bubbles. It is inside those bubbles that we cast judgment on the folk of the world who are not saved or church goers. The pastor also pointed out that empirically the only difference between church going believers and those not; is that goers own more Bibles. Goers are just as likely to lie, cheat, steal, harm and act in deceitful ways. Goers do tend to give more to faith based charity too but that’s about it.

Interestingly enough when we believers go into the world we tend to try awkward attempts at getting the world into our churches. We tend not to befriend first but ask and invite first which tends to put the none church attendee off. In fact often it makes them run away very quickly. So in very broad terms I began to think about the church that I’m a member of and the difficulties there now.

The church where I am a member is in crisis. Attendance is falling, people come but they don’t stay. I’m a prime example. There are individuals who are members of my church who I love and cherish but the larger church didn’t invite me in or engage me. They asked my spiritual inventory and then ignored it. They tried to plug me into areas where I have no passion, like hospitality and the board of trustees; where I still sit; but not for long. My passions revolve around singing, acting, visual arts, writing, teaching and preaching. All of those passions were ignored and dismissed. It was made very clear that my round peg wasn’t going to be put into my round hole and so I lost interest.

So, roughly a year after becoming a member of my church, I’m looking for a new one. A church closer to home, one where my round peg will be placed in my round hole and my faith passions can be explored. I know soon enough that I’m going to write a letter of resignation to my church. I think in it I will have to be open, honest and forthright with them and tell them exactly why I no longer feel lead to attend or be a member of their congregation. I approach this action with trepidation and when examining the action feel my light flicker. My church was very much a part of my recovery from years of self destructive behavior.

I love the members and the pastor of the church where I’m a member. They helped me discover that I am worthy and loved and most importantly I am capable of chaste love. They helped me discover that the living God not only lives in me but in all people and that all people are worthy of redemption and grace There I discovered that in order to get new folks into church you have to be their friend first, they have to see the light in you and taste the salt. The salt is Christ and living a life lead by his example, service and sacrifice. To pounce on guests the minute that they come through the door doesn’t work. Conversely it is also a failing to invite folks into membership, give them a spiritual inventory and then ignore it.

My prayer is that my church finds its way. I do think it will be a most difficult and arduous path for them. That church is so caught up in declining attendance and membership that they seem panicked. It’s sad really, the pastor is a most gifted preacher but the messages that she deliver seem to get skewed by frantic attempts to raise money and encourage people into the church.

My church's light does seem to be hidden beneath baskets or bowls, so many there tend to guard their turf with an uncommon zeal. I knew early on that I was aware that something was amiss; I’d sit in my pew and feel completely disconnected from the service and members. I fought for a while but now I’m certain that I’ve moved on. I moved on to rediscover my salt and my light hoping that it won’t flicker out, I trust that God will lead me to the right place and all will be well.

1 John 4:16 Rely on the love God has for us

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. - 1 John 4:16

Whoever lives in love lives in God, what a soothing and peaceful thought; and how difficult it is to abide by this each and everyday. Daily I find myself tested with the easy fall back to anger and hateful thinking. I have to remind myself that I don’t hate; but that I also don’t have to like other’s ways or behaviors. By allowing hateful thinking into my mind I am acting and thinking contrary to God and all of the wonderful things that God does in my life minute to minute and day to day. When anger colors our thinking it becomes the focus of our thinking and all that we are.

I like the beginning of this verse too; and so we know and rely on the love God has for us. The word “know” is the most telling word in this verse to me. To know God means that intentional and useful time must be spent getting to God. Here is where I also have a good deal of difficulty. You see the strains of daily modern life take me away from learning and knowing about God. Do I read my Bible as much as I’d like to or should? No. Do I pray as much as I’d like to or should? No. When I look at the world do I see a living God in everything and all people all of the time. No. So, I fall very short in my faith. Maybe this is what all of the evangelists have been preaching about for as long as time.

How interesting that at forty three years old I’m really now starting to think about all of this on a deeper more intimate level. Perhaps it is age and life events that are bringing me here. Perhaps it is the fact that I lost a partner and have never fully recovered from that. I have also seen untold blessings in life’s most difficult events. Perhaps it is that I now have a much wider and more diverse network of friends, acquaintances and associates that experience so many vast and different tests daily that mine sometimes seem very petty and silly.

I love finding God in my rule of three. Rule one is think of God first whenever acting. Rule two is think of others second when acting and rule three is think of self. By following those precepts it is so easy to stay close to God and God's blessings. Yes, life is a challenge, especially modern life, but I think if I rely on the love that God has for me, then it all will be ok in the end.

Anger and the rule of three

Ecclesiastes 7:9 Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.

What a fantastic and timely verse for me. The last three weeks, nay three years have truly tested my patience and my control. Thankfully there are many sages around me who have reminded me nicely to step back and think before acting, talking or typing; which I have learned to do. It is easy to become agitated when one close to you forces you to rip apart a business that one has poured your blood, sweat and tears into. Of course it is also easy to get a little terse when a confidant becomes a maker of mountains out of mice nuts.

So truly, anger does reside in the lap of fools. A fool is one who is quick to respond to provocation especially when that kind of action is contrary to core philosophies. My core philosophies happen to center on taking care of others first. I try to practice the law of three; which in my mind means God first, others second and self third. The law of three is most difficult when confronted by an irrational, angry and fundamentally damaged person.

With this in mind, my meditation for the week will be this verse from Ecclesiastes, it is timeless and true and worth living by. I knew when this change in my business came that I’d be the one that would have to figure out how it would happen. What I didn’t count on was the fact that every time I make a move thwarting road blocks are thrown up; which is a true test of patience. I’m in a constant quandary as to how to move or act because everything that I do is construed at intentional, when in fact none of it is.

So in dealing with all of this I look to the Psalm; Be still and know that I am God. That helps.

Cast your burden on the Lord

Psalm 55 verse 22
Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.

A dear friend who I love is in the throws of watching her granddaughter die of cancer. A mere child of nine, who hasn’t lived a long life but perhaps, has lived a full life by those who she has touched. I’ve never met this little girl in person, but through stories from her grandmother and writings by her mother I feel as if I’ve come to know her. I certainly feel like I better know my friend and her daughter. I certainly feel that my love for these people has deepened too.

The fullness of one’s life cannot be measured in years or time because quality is not temporal. To say that this little girl has been denied a long life is true, to say that her family has been denied is also true. This whole circumstance is wrong, un-natural and completely unfair. It is indeed a test of faith and leaves those of us at the periphery feeling at a loss as to what to say and when to say it. The phone lines and email circuits sizzle, when a crisis comes, with questions of what to do.

My counsel is to stand firm with this family; as the body of Christ and the living God we are called to comfort this family and let them cast some of their burden upon us. Some of us are naturally fearful that when we ask how things are; those questions will bring tears. We are trained as a society that causing another to cry is a bad thing; to that I say no it is the opposite. This family is hurting; they are holding it in when near one another and this little girl. They need friends and the body of Christ to lean on and cry out to. This makes them strong to face what they need to and to carry on in a busy and stressful time.

It is our task to take some of the burden from this family and lift them up in prayer because it is easy when facing crisis day in and out to forget to consciously pray. There are those times of unconscious prayer that happen routinely but I’m not sure those prayers comfort as much. Our prayers for this family embolden us to say to them that we love them, care for them, stand with them and in turn let them do the same for one another.

So, a little girl, whom I’ve never met, who is being tested beyond belief while I stand on the periphery has taught many immense lessons of love, support and understanding. In conscious prayer I lift her family up and in thought and deed I keep her and her family in my focus remembering to reach out to them so that they might be strong enough to face whatever is coming. To that end, have I lost hope; no. There is always hope because there is always God and in the end…something better.

Free Tibet, Free China when one is a victim we all are!

In the Gospel of Luke, John the Baptizer when asked by the crowd, what to do says: He who has two coats let him share with him who has none, and he who has food let him do likewise”(3:11).

So, when called to Christian ministry and social justice I see things much the same way, especially when contemplating human rights and oppression. Therefore I will approach the Peoples Republic of China and their actions and also the actions of the present administration in the U.S. and the capitalists in the U.S. and worldwide in much the same fashion. Could we ask this question with respect to human rights, freedom of religion, freedom of speech and a whole host of other personal liberties?

The Peoples Republic of China’s government is doing its level best to quash the movement for freedom in Tibet spearheaded by the Buddhists in that region lead by the Dali Lama. The evil that is the Peoples Republic will stop at nothing to keep Tibet under its boot. They will lie, cheat, kill, steal and spin the truth to break the spirit if not the backs of the Tibetans. Therefore, as I see it, we could say; if one has freedom, let him share with those who have none. If one has a voice, let him share it with those who have none. It is the duty and obligation for every follower of Christ to speak out and take action against the Peoples Republic of China.

Our call to action is to boycott products made in China to not only punish the totalitarian government there but the capitalists who lie down with this vile den of vipers. Included in this den is the International Olympic organization who choose Beijing for the Olympics and most consumer companies who promote if not give a blind eye to the forced labor and slavery upon which the Chinese capitalist model is built. We are obligated as followers of Christ to call attention to the tens of thousands if not millions who toil to feed the beast which is Chinese capitalism. We are charged to withhold our dollars in attempt to starve that beast which shackles of so many.

For nearly twenty years the world has turned a blind eye to Chinese oppression, hostility, anger and manipulation because of its thirst for inexpensive clothing and consumer trinkets. It is time for us to raise up a chorus of voices to force change in the Peoples Republic of China and in the board rooms of capitalist ventures worldwide. It is time for followers of Christ to raise ruckus in the halls of Congress and the White House to force change. It is time for all of us to understand that when one of us is a slave, prisoner or victim we are all victims. It is time for the followers of Christ to say no more slavery, oppression and violence in Tibet or greater China.

The irony in all of this is that today President George W. Bush’s national security advisor Stephen Hadley has said, “The kind of "quiet diplomacy" that the U.S. is practicing is a better way to send a message to China's leaders rather than "frontal confrontation." What simple nonsense and cop out. What caused the Soviet Union to fall was Ronald Reagan standing up to them and the evil that they were. What is needed now is a bulwark of Reagan’s stature to stand against the Chinese and their capitalist friends. Unfortunately I do not see one ready to take up the standard here in the west and the only one on the world stage is the Dali Lama a leader in exile and country less. So until the Dali Lama has backing, a voice and worldwide support I will write and pray for change in Tibet and the Peoples Republic of China.

The evil that is the Chinese Governement

(Romans 2:4) says "can't you see that he has been waiting all this time without punishing you, to give you time to turn from your sin? His kindness is meant to lead you to repentance.'

Oh to the government of China and those capitalist ventures involved in the Beijing Olympics. Oh to those ventures who have sold their souls for fifty pieces of Gold? Oh to those capitalists who have bedded down with a villainous, totalitarian, abusive, wretched and quasi-communist~facist government. The government of the Peoples Republic of China and the capitalists that bed down with them are true evil. They are as bad as Chairman Mao, Mussolini, Stalin and Adolph Hitler. The extent of the abuse carried out by the Chi-Com government will be the bell weather gauge for evil in the first half of the twenty first century.

The Chi-Com government embedded in Beijing is the monster that without conscience gunned down and destroyed the protestors in Tiananmen Square some twenty years ago. This is the government that has oppressed Buddhist, Christian, Muslim, Tibetan, Mongul and ethnic Korean. This is the two headed dragon that bulldozes house Churches all across their empire because they know that if the fundamental tenants of Christian love and social justice take hold that they are ruined. They also know that if radical elements of Islam take hold in their western frontiers that they are indeed doomed.

Make no mistake of whom we’re dealing with. This is a cadre that has sold itself to the capitalists of the world and made a back room deal with them to stay in power. The brokered deal; to the capitalists, you stay out of government and we the politicos will leave you alone. You the capitalists will be free to spread poisoned pet food throughout the world. You money makers can also create poisoned tooth paste and add copious amounts of lead and lead paint to children’s toys. You have free rein to do those things as long as the Chi-Com regime has free rein to destroy any and all dissent in Tibet or any where in the evil empire.

Here is a cadre of evil doers with no conscience to turn from sin. This cadre is guilty of sin of destruction of personal values and beliefs, the sin of oppression, murder and rape. This cadre is most guilty of have no moral gauge, no compass to guide them from right to wrong. There is no shame in Chi-Com China, there are no morals, and there is no decent right ground. The same is true of the capitalists who profiteer from the evil in the Peoples Republic of China and the consumer world wide who turn a blind eye to the evil in the Chinese government.

It is time to follow the lesson of Romans 2:4 and turn our gaze to the leadership of God, who is infinite and just. It is time for them to follow a God who through God’s example will lead all of those who follow away from sin and wretchedness. Will the Chi-Com regime and the capitalists in bed with them do this? Not until the consumer world wide holds them accountable for their wicked, wicked ways.